Millions of people today are embarking on a journey of personal development. There are numerous paths to choose from and some are more effective, thorough and practical than others. Many have to do with business and success and they outline practical steps and the values of very successful people. Others promote mainstream therapies dealing with stress, relationship or career crisis, and a multitude of health problems or addictions.

New age or alternative practitioners espouse a spiritual approach to everything based on the harmony of one’s energy field. Various techniques and workshops are taught all over the world and are usually based on principles of spiritual masters from different cultures.

One premise that many approaches promote is goal setting and the power of intention for all areas of life. The goals include the outcomes of therapy, workshops attended, family desires or financial targets with future dates and amounts earned or invested. They are told the goals or intentions are the foundation or starting point to their recovery or success.

But how about the millions of people who simply do not know their heart’s desire? They are either lost or seeking their personal truth and are advised to cognitively create goals for their future. Why? This is confusing and overwhelming.

I believe this method takes people down a blind alley and it is premature. It’s good to embrace the unknown for a while. It’s healthy to say, “I’m not sure where I’m headed or what I really want yet.” It’s OK to accept that one is disappointed in life so far. It does not matter what one’s age is. Most young people get lost sometimes and older folks have a midlife crisis and revisit that lost feeling.

One of my personal character flaws that took years to transform is that I did not trust myself or life. My first major self-betrayal was that I permitted my parents to sway me away from psychology at university into business. They said it was more practical.

So I graduated, entered the corporate world and never looked back. I obtained my master’s degree (MBA) and climbed the ladder to please my parents, though this was mostly unconscious. I was told to set specific career goals before I knew myself, trusted myself or had explored my heart’s desire. It took me 15 years to understand my own motives and choices.