Sigmund Freud said, “I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father’s protection,” and for much of the past century men have been encouraged to believe their role as a parent was simply that of a protective but emotionally distant provider. This notion was further reinforced by popular theories in child development that implied the relationship between mother and child was the only one of any real significance.

Of course, there is no argument that a father’s protection is needed now more than ever before, but in today’s complicated world, a child needs so much more from their dad than is provided by the traditional concept of father as protector. The reality is that today’s father needs to be an involved and emotionally available co-parent.

There has been a huge shift in parenting in the past few decades and much attention has been given to the importance of a father’s role in raising his children. Research has repeatedly shown that a strong paternal relationship is fundamental, not only for the welfare of the child, but also the wellbeing of the father himself.

The significance of fathering is beautifully illustrated in the book, The Collected Wisdom of Fathers, by Will Glennon, who writes, “Fathering is different from mothering. We come to our task from the outside, and captured in that configuration is the miracle we have to offer; for true fathering is not the physical act of planting a seed; it is the conscious decision to tend and nourish the seedling. Real fathering is not biological — it is the conscious choice to build an unconditional and unbreakable connection to another human being.”

Much of the recent acknowledgment of paternal parenting has been focused on the relationship between father and son as human male offspring have, historically, essentially learned their skills by working side by side in apprenticeship with their father. While recognising the importance of fathers being available to their sons is to be applauded, the enormous importance of dads in the lives of their daughters is often forgotten or overlooked.

Fathers, as the primary male role models in girls’ lives, have a profound influence on their daughters. While many men do have a sense of that influence, they don’t necessarily grasp the underlying principles behind it. Having grown up as a boy, it is virtually impossible for an adult male to understand what it’s like to be a girl. This gender inexperience, often coupled with psychological conditioning from their own upbringing that girls are the sole responsibility of the mother, causes some men to shy away from getting “too close” to, or exploring deeper relationships with, their daughters.