Couple in love

What the planets can tell you about your love needs

Venus is the prettiest planet and her brightness, second only to that of the Sun and Moon, has helped shed light on love matters throughout history.

There’s a number of factors that can influence the quality, tone and focus of your Venus and therefore your love life. Some of these factors include whether you were born with Venus as morning or evening star, whether or not Venus is moving forwards (direct motion) or backwards (retrograde) in your chart, Venus’ speed and any links, known as aspects, to other planets. But even before astrologers consider these technical factors, they observe the element and mode of the zodiac sign in which your Venus is placed.

Each zodiac sign is a unique blend of one element and one mode. The four elements in astrology — fire, earth, air and water — represent four motivating forces. They show what you want. The three modes in astrology — cardinal, fixed and mutable — describe how you go about getting your needs met.

The element of your Venus describes what you look for in a partner and the kinds of things you like to do in a relationship. Your Venus mode shows whether you are more likely to take action to make this happen, to go with the flow in love or to stick with familiar relationship patterns.

Venus & the Sun

Since Venus never moves too far from the Sun, it’s only possible to have Venus in the one or two signs before your Sun or star sign, in the same sign as your Sun or star sign, or in the one or two right after it. Below is a list of the signs so you can see in which five possible signs you could have Venus.

For instance, Duchess of Cambridge Katherine Middleton is a Capricorn, which suggests her Venus will be in either Scorpio, Sagittarius (the two signs before her Sun sign), Capricorn (her Sun sign itself), Aquarius or Pisces (the two signs after her Sun sign).

The Duchess’ Venus is in Aquarius (the sign right after her Sun sign of Capricorn). Aquarius is a fixed air sign. Air qualities, including communication, describe the Duchess’ key needs, wants and deal breakers in relationships. The fixed mode, which includes patience and loyalty, shows the way in which she’ll approach romantic matters.

You don’t need your time of birth to find out your Venus sign but you do need your day, month and year of birth. You can look up your Venus sign in the tables on either one of these websites: cafeastrology.com/venussignstables.html or astro.com/swisseph/venus.htm.

Energy & elements

A variety of ancient philosophies are based on the four elements of fire, earth, air and water. The elements are considered universal building blocks and are believed to represent different facets of the original energy source. In Astrology, Psychology and the Four Elements, Stephen Arroyo writes that, to the ancient Greeks, the elements described “man’s four faculties: moral (fire), aesthetic and soul (water), intellectual (air) and physical (earth)”.

The elements are “root principles”. Earth represents things that are solid, air is connected to gaseous states and things that are airy, water is linked to liquids and the concept of fluidity. Fire symbolises energy and light.

Yin & yang

The elements themselves are divided into two groups of two. Fire and air are yang or active elements, while earth and water are yin or passive elements. Arroyo also links ancient Greek concepts about energy to the elements. He describes fire and air as being Apollonian; that is, they actively and consciously form life, while water and earth are Dionysian and therefore represent forces that manifest unconsciously and instinctively.

The element of your Venus describes what you look for in a partner and the kinds of things you like to do in a relationship.

Yang or active elements (fire and air) contain an initiating drive. They go after what they want. Yang signs are inherently expressive, perhaps wearing their hearts on their sleeves. Yang signs instantly share all kinds of feelings, like tender love or frustration, either through taking action or conversation. Air and fire expand and spread. Similarly, if you have Venus in an air or fire sign, your feelings, needs and wants in love must be shared, released and expressed.

Yin or passive elements (water and earth) are receptive and focus on attracting or drawing in what they desire. Yin signs are introspective, careful and cautious. Love builds slowly and steadily in the heart of yin signs, and commitments are made only after careful consideration. Earth and water are elements that pool or collect, so if you have Venus in an earth or water sign you may experience periods of inactivity or being stuck in relationships. On the other hand, you may enjoy the comfort of what’s familiar in love and cherish heartfelt relationship rituals and memories.

Action & passion: Venus on Fire

Aries, Leo, Sagittarius

Fire signs are active, expressive and competitive. They say what they think, sometimes without considering how it might sound. If you have Venus in a fire sign you’re likely quick to anger, but get over your frustrations just as fast. You’re honest and prefer it when loved ones are direct and to the point. Venus in a fire sign wants a relationship that’s going somewhere, making shared ambitions important. You might be spontaneous or open-minded, but you know what you want — and usually have a plan for how you’re going to get it. Venus in a fire sign is passionate but can end up in a “break up, make up” relationship pattern. Drama is OK, as is tension.

In love you’ll seek a confident, outgoing or active partner who’s as expressive as you are. You get bored with routines and will seek adventure — either through travel, the arts or physical challenges — to keep your relationship alive. You thrive on attention and can be competitive. You enjoy a challenge and when you work together with your partner the two of you can achieve goals — in life, at work or in your relationship — that amaze others.

Sensual & stable: Earth Venus

Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn

Earth signs are sensual, tactile and stable. They seek security, prefer stability over change and are drawn to experiences that satiate the senses. If you have Venus in an earth sign you’re loyal and prefer traditional relationships. Commitment and security are important to you and you can be practical about romance, often adopting a matter-of-fact approach to relationship realities.

You’re patient and willing to work towards relationship goals over time, so a partner who can focus on the long term is ideal. One of your most endearing qualities is your loyalty, and you want a partner who is as reliable as you are. You have a natural understanding of money and prefer a partner who’s also grounded with finances.

Behind closed doors you are sensual and love physical affection, so a partner who’s happy to hold your hand, in public and in private, or give you a hug when you need it is key. Quality counts and you’re patient enough to wait — first for the right partner and then to enjoy each new stage of your relationship as it develops.

Curious & conversational: Air Venus

Gemini, Libra, Aquarius

Air signs are all about communication, so a partner who’s talkative and open to new ideas is important. Conversation is like food for your soul, so you’ll show your love through sharing facts and trivia, and by listening to your partner’s thoughts and plans.

Your curious streak means you want to keep learning, so a partner who’s open to discovery and discussion is a must. You may appear to have a detached view of love, as air operates in the abstract, but the way to your heart is through your mind. You’re attracted to intelligence.

Consider sharing books or going to topical lectures or trivia nights together. In your eyes, knowledge is seductive. Physical affection comes second to mental connection. At heart you’re social and your ideal partner is one who also enjoys meeting new people.

Soulful & sensitive: Water Venus

Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces

Water signs are sensitive, caring and intuitive, so if this is you, you’re a card-carrying romantic. When it comes to love, you crave sweet words and romantic dates and will always look after your partner. Your sensitivity means you can pick up on what’s not said, so you’ll always want to work things out. Arroyo notes that water is driven by “intense yearnings, feeling reactions and compelling desires”.

For you, love is free-flowing and instinctive, which can mean you struggle with boundaries. One of your big love lessons is to learn that just because you can sense a loved one’s pain, it doesn’t mean you’re responsible for fixing it.

You’re searching for a deep, unspoken, almost intuitive connection. Once committed, you strive to keep the romance alive and will continue showing affection for years to come. Physical connection and sex are important as they allow you to experience the most meaningful intimacy. You want to know everything about your partner and love spending quality time together.

Your Love MO

The mode of your Venus sign shows the way you go about expressing, or satisfying, your love needs. The modes also describe your pace in love.

Cardinal Fixed Mutable
Aries Tarus Gemini
Cancer Leo Virgo
Libra Scorpio Sagittarius
Capricorn Aquarius Pisces

 

Taking charge: Cardinal signs

Aries, Cancer, Libra, Capricorn

Cardinal signs are connected to the equinoxes and solstices. These are the signs that are activated by the Sun when new seasons begin. Due to the connection between cardinal signs and a new season, cardinal signs symbolise initiative, action and moving in new directions. Cardinal signs are responsive and reactive, and adapt with new objectives to changing circumstances. They do what needs to be done.

Yang signs are inherently expressive, perhaps wearing their hearts on their sleeves.

If you have Venus in a cardinal sign, you take action to get what you want. As circumstances change, you adjust your plans and set new goals. You may be impatient with the slow pace of a relationship, or the time it takes a loved one to make choices. With Venus in a cardinal sign you prefer fast and instinctive decisions. You may benefit from learning patience and giving loved ones the time they need to decide.

Slow & steady: Fixed signs

Taurus, Leo, Scorpio, Aquarius

Fixed signs are linked to the signs activated by the Sun in the middle of a season. Fixed signs are thus about continuity, stability and repetition. If you have Venus in a fixed sign, you are slow to fall in love but, once you do, you stay committed. Your natural love pace is slow but enduring.

With Venus in a fixed sign you’re loyal and loving, but your resistance to change means you may be stubborn about new experiences or hold onto a relationship long after it’s passed its use-by date. Since your instinct is to carry on tomorrow as you have done in the past, consciously embracing change or trying new things can help keep your love life, or your relationship, fresh.

A changeable heart: Mutable signs

Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius, Pisces

Mutable signs are those activated by the Sun at the end of a season and are associated with change. Mutable signs represent things that vary and adapt. With Venus in a mutable sign you may lack focus in love and may constantly change your mind about what you want in a relationship or a partner. Your love pace fluctuates and you can move fast or slow in relationships, depending on circumstances.

If you have Venus in a mutable sign, you like variety and easily adjust to change. However, you can get bored with routine. Being so flexible means you may lose sight of what you really need, so learning to honour what you want in love, rather than what a situation or person offers, is key.

Exploring your Venus element and mode can help reveal the true nature of your love needs. You may also benefit from considering your partner’s Venus element and mode, and reflecting on whether the two of you share similar or different romantic desires. As you come to better understand your own heart, it’ll be easier to express your love needs — and get them met.

Kelly Surtees

Kelly Surtees

With more than 14 years in private practice, Kelly Surtees is experienced, warm and insightful. She loves exploring astrology’s history as well as escaping into the ocean. Kelly’s passion for astrology is infectious, and her specialty areas include career and life direction, health and fertility, love, health and happiness. Kelly is an expat Aussie who lives in Canada most of the year.

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