Sex, energy, and relationships

Often when relationships begin to go wrong, people find there seems to be a lack of intimacy with their partner. There could be any number of reasons for this, however excuses of being too tired, too busy, not in the mood are simply that – just excuses. Sex is a healthy, natural, normal part of life. If it is being associated with feelings of guilt, shame or pushed aside, then maybe it’s time to look at the reasons why.

Part of being healthy means that we integrate as much as possible our emotions, thoughts, physicality and spirituality. This means our energy centres also are functioning properly and we are working on opening some of our blockages.

Our second energy centre (or chakra) is the centre that functions in tune with our sexuality and creativity. If it’s not working properly your confidence, trust, ability to manifest and desires in general will not function properly either. It is roughly two inches above your pubic bone and just under your navel. Its colour is orange when healthy. If you are not feeling particularly sexual, then you could be just going through a phase in your life. If this closed-down feeling stays for any length of time, though, you need to start to look at why. How are you expressing the energy of that second chakra? Are you using your energy creatively?

Part of being healthy means that we integrate as much as possible our emotions, thoughts, physicality and spirituality.

Sometimes that energy can be channelled into creative pursuits, which will give healthy expression to the chakra. However, if this is not happening, then maybe you should be questioning why there is a blockage in that area – before your body becomes physically ill.

Hormones can play a huge factor in this. Usually you can tell what chakras are not working well from the areas of your body that are experiencing dis-ease. If you are having issues with your menstrual cycle or menopause, then perhaps look at how you are relating to yourself as a woman. Similarly, if you are having prostrate problems, take a look at how confident you are in your manhood. Often hormonal issues can become better due to a healthy sex life, because when you have sex your hormone levels increase. This holds true also for men, provided they do not allow themselves to ejaculate too quickly.

When we stop having sex, we stop sometimes expressing ourselves creatively. Our second chakra becomes weak, our confidence is affected and often we come to the point where we even have trouble expressing sexual feelings. These feelings then become diverted into other pursuits while we kid ourselves that everything is OK. Meanwhile, your partner is in front of the computer and you are asleep in front of the TV and there is no communication. If this is happening in your relationship, you need to wake up before your relationship really starts to suffer, before you become physically ill from the blockages of not expressing a vital part of your being.

So, apart from sex being a pleasurable experience, it also helps you relax, reduces stress and therefore helps you sleep better. When your blood pressure increases during the sex act, many great hormones and chemicals are released. This increases your cardiovascular health, releases anti-ageing hormones, increases your endorphins, dopamine levels, Oxytocin and serotonin levels, and even reduces pain. On a spiritual level, the intensity of orgasm has been said to bring people closer to glimpsing what enlightenment would feel like and the physical euphoria of afterglow is a great remedy for any form of anxiety or depression.

There may be times when sex is not on the menu for whatever reasons and it may be in your best interests to just rest, relax or meditate. But if that becomes an ongoing habit, perhaps it’s time to seek help from a trained natural therapist. Maybe it’s time to question why you are denying yourself an experience to unite, share and express your love with your partner.